Scott Morrison to star in new drama series.

Prime Minister of Australia Scott Morrison will play the lead role in God UnFriended Me, set to stream across multiple platforms from October. The innovative series recounts the events which lead God to unfriend Morrison on Facebook and to eventually dissociate himself from the Pentecostal Christian altogether.

The series opens with the smirking face of Morrison as he accepts a friend request from God. The first episode then proceeds with a dramatic and heart-wrenching comparison of the lives of Morrison’s daughters and the daughters of the Muruguppan family, who have been denied the right to live peacefully in Australia despite the fact that both daughters were born in Australia. Episode one also highlights the central role of the Pentecostal Church in Morrison’s life and God’s great love for his loyal Christian Soldier.

Throughout the series, Morrison proudly displays his Pentecostal faith, his links to Hillsong boss Brian Houston and his close ties with The Almighty. Viewers are led to believe that Morrison’s faith and relationship with God underpin all of his political decisions. In episode 2, the blissful relationship between the prime minister and his God begins to disintegrate.

The confronting and gripping second episode opens with images of the climate crisis, as frightening as any imagery from the Old Testament. The somber reality of an uninhabitable planet is then explained in the context of Morrison’s devotion to the fossil fuel industry. At this point, God is seen to disapprove of Morrison’s determination to allow resource companies to continually destroy his greatest creation.

Morrison seems blissfully unaware of the impending doom, but is photographed building a replica of Noah’s Ark under the guise of building a cubby house for his daughters. Episode two leaves viewers guessing if the construction of the ‘cubby house’ indicates Morrison’s admission of a future full of floods and natural disasters, or a desperate desire to win back the approval of God.

Throughout the following episodes, God is seen to grow frustrated after the prime minister campaigns for re-election on a promise to turn back asylum seekers, which contravenes human rights laws and God’s call to ‘love thy neighbour’.

Morrison is also shown to ignore the meaning of ‘blessed are the poor’ when he refuses to raise welfare payments while offering tax breaks to the rich. He also ignores the plight of women and Indigenous Australians. God then takes to Messenger to remind the PM to read relevant sections of the Bible which outline the teachings of Jesus and the need to treat all human beings with dignity and respect. Morrison ignores the messages.

While God grows weary of Morrison for general ethical and moral failures, he disapproves strongly of a direct challenge to the Ten Commandments. When deputy PM Barnaby Joyce commits adultery, Morrison refuses to sanction the National Party member and God loses patience with both of them.

Finally, God is no longer able to endorse his once loyal Christian Soldier, and he threatens to sue Morrison for defamation. He also suspects Morrison is becoming increasingly devoted to Rupert Murdoch. Morrison, meanwhile, is seen to plead with God and promise The Almighty that he is doing everything in His name.

Eventually, God officially unfriends Morrison on Facebook and the series ends on a cliffhanger as viewers watch Morrison deciding whether to seek solace in the arms of Gina Rinehart or Rupert Murdoch.

God Unfriended Me streams via Facebook and all other streaming services available in Australia from October 1.

Image: Craig Greenhill

Parliament House for 4 Year Olds.

Parliament House for 4 Year Olds is a delightful new TV series in which young children teach Australia’s federal politicians how to behave. The landmark series will be filmed inside Parliament House, Canberra, and follows the ground-breaking documentary Old People’s Home for 4 Year Olds, which aired on the Australian Broadcasting Commission (ABC) in 2017.

The successful ABC series followed a group of 4-year-old children during their visits to an aged-care facility. The interaction between residents and the children was proven to improve the physical, mental and emotional wellbeing of the elderly participants, and it is hoped the series at Parliament House will improve the basic human decency of politicians.

“The 4-year-olds will teach politicians how to behave,” explained the show’s creators.

“The children will teach politicians and staffers in the nation’s capital basic principles such as morality, fairness, honesty, equality, justice, tolerance and sharing – the basic values that early childhood educators instil in young children every day, and the kind of behaviours that are often called ‘Australian Values’.”

The multi-part series will take politicians and their staffers through activities designed to remind them that boys and girls should be treated equally, that ‘sharing is caring’ and that if someone was using the toys first, it’s not acceptable to just steal those toys and never give them back. Politicians will also learn that it is normal to share the sand pit and swing set with someone who looks or sounds different to you, and that bullying is never ok.

“Boys are now learning that punching or slapping a girl, pulling her hair or pushing her off the monkey bars is not a form of flirting or affection, that it’s actually a form of bullying. In light of this, children will teach the nation’s leaders that if they’re being bullied, they should tell an adult, because the adult will try to help you and not just ignore you.”

Politicians from all parties have been invited to attend, and they will be taught that errant bodily fluids can make everyone sick and are just ‘yukky’.

“We are happy to include the nation’s leaders in our toilet training sessions, and to remind them of the true purpose of bathrooms.”

Children will instruct politicians and their staffers that telling the truth is always important, even when that is difficult, and that it can be harmful to spread nasty rumours about someone behind their back.

“We are also confident that the series will put an end to participants bringing prostitutes into the corridors of power, because a 4-year-old doesn’t even know what a prostitute is.”

Parliament House for 4 Year Olds will not be shown on the ABC, because the politicians participating in the series are the ones currently dismantling the national broadcaster. Instead, the series will be aired after shows such as MKR, I’m A Celebrity and MAFS, because a direct correlation has been found between viewing scripted reality TV shows and voting amoral politicians back into power.

For fans of reality TV shows, they will also have the chance to ‘vote’ the participants off the show at the next election. Furthermore, producers plan to extend the program to state parliaments, where politicians can learn how to avoid physical relationships with people who have been involved in widespread corruption, and that the number 3 million is not the same as the number 30 million.

Parliament House for 4 Year Olds will air at the beginning of next month, and will be available on catch up services.

Parliament House for 4 Year Olds; because 4-year-olds are perfect role models for politicians”

Image: Katrina Knapp